Discovering the Beauty Within the Beast?

We all know the saying that beauty is only skin deep.

It’s a great concept that is the basis of the Disney fairy tale called Beauty and the Beast. In that story, true love prevails despite the Beast being under a spell that makes him ugly on the outside. The female character, aptly named Beauty, allows true love to override her perceptions of looks by the end of the story with surprising outcomes, that were beyond her dreams. She got her prince by loving the beast for what he really was.

The concept of beauty haunts many of us. I am no exception. We all in some way see ourselves as, the Beast no matter how truly wonderful we are. Our unconscious search for perfection leads many of us to unwarranted self-deprecation when it comes to our looks, particularly as we age, and our looks invariably change.

Hollywood is full of beautiful people, and we are witness to famous people being ranked by the media on how they look and dress. Many of us rank others that we meet based on their looks. It lacks authenticity and substance but it’s how we live.

Now I’m not saying that looks don’t matter in a romantic relationship because clearly, they play a part. We live in a physical world and who doesn’t want a good-looking partner. But let’s face it, physical attraction may be first base in a relationship, but it alone probably will not take you all the way to the home plate and into the happily ever-after.

Those who are genetically gifted in life, some might say hot, face a double-edged sword that many of us don’t have to deal with. Firstly, people naturally are drawn to them and want to be in their presence. This can be both sexual but also ego-centric for some of us believe that having a close relationship with that person would elevate our importance in life.

But I’m sure this introduces a new level of confusion for those with the gift of true beauty. Who do they trust? Who really loves them and who is only pretending to do so out of lust or the desire to possess that person’s beauty in their life?

As is often said many of us are feted to pretend. Spare a thought for those whose beauty takes our attention and breath away for perhaps they have different challenges to the average person.

And how can they ever know the intentions of another when the other person who is pursuing them doesn’t even truly understand their own intentions or sub-conscious beliefs. They are driven by a force they may not understand.

I recently interacted with a woman, who shall remain nameless, who brought me to this understanding within myself. Her beauty is extraordinary, and, in a way, I felt sorry for her. Her intuition needs to be next level to discern whether suitors are in the energy of love or lust I assume.

I have also had to contend with my own egoic reactions as a result of meeting her and other stunning women since. I am grateful for what she and others have helped me see in myself and dispel.

When you go on dating sites or view people’s profiles on social media you can sense the pressure on people to present a particular physical level of appearance, despite the beauty is skin-deep concept being in our full vernacular.

Women are particularly under pressure to present in the most beautiful way possible as our social conditioning tells us that a beautiful woman is more likely to get the man she wants. Men on the other hand are judged more heavily on their career success and financial status. Can they provide and do so better than others?

This type of conditioning goes back thousands of years. We are primal beings and our ability to pro-create the next generation is in-built within us. As a result, we seek often the most physically attractive partner we can find. We are programmed this way, even though as intelligent beings we can discern and choose a path beyond our primal instincts.

Men particularly seek to own the beauty of an attractive woman. But why? Are they really lacking in substance when it comes to love?

Let’s consider an analogy.

Consider a beautiful sunrise or sunset. I think we would all agree that both are staggeringly beautiful. Nature has a beauty that we can all immerse ourselves in and appreciate.

But can we own it and do we try? No of course not!

Can we feel like we are a part of it? Yes we can, because the reality is we are nature. At our core we are natural beings just like other animals.

Inside our hearts sits the beauty we are seeking in life. It’s the beauty we truly try to find from others if we can’t or don’t access it within ourselves.

The Beast in Beauty and the Beast found his own true love, and from this place he was able to attract beauty into his life without needing to control it or lock it away in his castle. His inner reality became his outer reality, which is always the case in life, for we create our own realities – always!

Many relationships commence with physical attraction as their core proposition. Its nature’s initial calling card. But as we all know external beauty can fade over time. Our inner beauty never dims and in fact often shines brighter as we evolve and discover more of ourselves as we age and open ourselves up to greater self- discovery. It’s this energy that really provides the magnetism to bring lovers into deep connection.

Next time you stand in front of a mirror or witness a beautiful person why not try and feel your own inner beauty. And spare a thought for that beautiful person, for although they may be advantaged in some ways that you are not, they may well have been manipulated by people just wanting to own what nature bestowed upon them or they worked hard in the gym to achieve.

I am not criticising anyone for the way we behave around beauty. Its normal and comes from our conditioned way of being. It took me great awareness work to free myself from its shackles. However, all beliefs can dissolve once we are aware of them and choose to take a different path.

We can want beauty but when we need it a different seeking energy arises within us, and it’s ultimately unattractive.

Beauty and the Beast may be seen as a children’s story and a fairy tale of sorts. However, if you ever get the chance to see the stage show or watch the movie why not use it to reflect on the inner beauty that you and others around you truly hold. But to do that you will need to look inward and not just in the mirror.

Beauty is truly a feeling not a story – it’s a gift to be admired but can never be taken from another. To find it in another look into their eyes for they are the window to that person’s soul, the place where true beauty resides. It’s not found in a castle.

We all strive to live a successful life and to own beautiful things. That’s normal. However, why not seek to live a beautiful life, not because you have a beautiful partner or a beautiful house but because you can feel the true beauty in your own heart, and you enjoy bringing that forth into your life, each day. Now that’s natural.

What’s your experience with beauty and the need to constantly impress others with your looks?

And for women who are constantly told that you are beautiful how does that make you feel? I’m curious to know. Does it frustrate you that you are seen in this one dimension so often?

Check out my book ‘Where Your Happiness Hides’ if you want to go deeper into our beliefs and how we can transform them to create a happier life for ourselves.

You are worth it for you are beautiful. We all are in the depths of our hearts!

Don’t hesitate to contact me at mark@mark.worthington.com if you would like to share your views on this post with me. You never know it could be a beautiful exchange of ideas.